Communicating with children is a complex process. I deliberately do not use the word difficult, because there is no difficult communication when you love. But it is also important to evaluate our behavior towards children, the words we use, because every single thing absorbs into them and sprouts the corresponding emotion.
If we are not able to communicate with them properly, to listen to them, to predispose them to share, then the contact with them will gradually fade away and at some point we will ask ourselves "Where did I go wrong “. Maybe some of these mistakes you'll read about here will help you avoid saying that phrase…
We keep reminding
Too frequent reminding or hinting like "Is this done", "Have you eaten", "Have you dressed", "Have you studied" is not only annoying for children, but at some point they will even stop you hear and respond.Which in any case is a negative result as a result of your behavior and upbringing method. It would be more correct to let the child be independent instead of constantly monitoring him with a critical eye.
Children ask you questions with genuine curiosity, the answers to which are important to them. And you answer with "Yes", "No" or with very short answers because you are tired and you don't care. Overcome boredom and accept that there is a blank sheet of paper in your child's head that is constantly being filled with information. Now decide where you prefer this information to come from - from you, from the television, from the grandmothers or from the children on the street?
When your little one asks you a question, do you notice how you suddenly change the tone of your voice - it suddenly becomes baby-soothing, like you're talking to a baby? Do not change your intonation, but understand that children are infinitely intelligent and feel the difference you make to them and adults.
You're in a hurry to change the subject
You start an awkward conversation with the child and don't know how to continue the topic. You are quick to change the direction of the conversation, leaving things hanging and unclear for the child to fill in on their own. Wrong move. The more correct behavior when you don't know exactly what to say is to be sincere in your answers. Skipping the topic will be felt as if by radar by the child, and he will not stop being interested in the topic, sensing your indecision.
You talk too much
Another big mistake in communicating with the child is that you conduct continuous monologues, pretending to conduct a dialogue. It is important to give the child the opportunity to share an opinion and express a position and discuss the topic together (!)
It is very cruel and often done by parents to blame children for actions that have not even been committed by them. "It's your fault if you fall, if you break, if you bump…" and the flow just doesn't stop.Instead, try to explain to the child what the consequences of his/her actions would be without implying that he/she will be at fault.